as long as we're going down

...and I realize I've been writing fanfiction (and posting it online) long enough for me to cringe at my older pieces.  Which makes me wonder if I even, you know, want to bother cross-posting some of my old stuff.

It also makes me want to write more FFVII stuff, if only because I like my current writing style so much more than what it used to be back in my FFVII hey-day, as it may be.  Not that all my old FFVII stuff is crap, because there's a fair amount of it I still like and am quite proud of, but...you know.  I'd like to see what I could do with it nowadays.  History in the context of Hetalia needs to stop eating my brain.

(I feel like everything I've posted today ends up, like, next-door of where I wanted it to be.  Not real far off, but...not quite on target, either.  I think I'm just in a funk from the sick.)

So I still had some stuff over in my old bedroom at my parents' place, like under the bed and whatnot, so I finally went over there and took a gander, and found like ALL the notebooks I started writing (mostly fanfiction) in.

Oh.  Em.  Gee.  It was terrible and hilarious and nostalgic and terrible.

The (w)angst!  The self-insert Mary-Sues!  The rushed romances!  The clear lack of understanding of how sex actually works!  The painful anachronisms in historical fics!  The even more painful usage of late '90s pop songs!  And did I mention the (w)angst?  I just want to travel back in time and tell my 12-13 year-old self, "DON'T DO IT.  FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DON'T DO IT."

I wish I had a bonfire pit because I would so burn those notebooks to destroy the horrid, horrid evidence they provide.  As it is, I'm utilizing a paper shredder because these poor things must be destroyed, and I'm too embarrassed to simply put the very whole, very readable papers into the recycling.  There are a couple of the "better" ones I think I'll hold onto for nostalgic purposes, but ZOMG the rest have got to go.

Obviously I know that if it weren't for all those badfics, I wouldn't be where I am now, but that still doesn't make up for the fact that they are badfics.  I recall having the same reaction when I looked through my high-school art portfolio.  Though there wasn't nearly so much disgust and embarrassment.

Still, I take comfort in the fact that, technically, I was a pretty damn kick-ass writer for a tween.  Proper dialogue tags, good paragraph breaks, correct spelling (I think I remember using a pocket dictionary and thesaurus, to be honest...).  I even knew how to use a semi-colon, though they still made me a little nervous--kind of like driver's ed, when they let you off the parking lot and onto the actual road.

I kind of have to wonder, though...  Pretty much ALL of those stories from way back when were romances.  And once I started writing...well, I can't say "professionally," but once I started writing seriously, romance pretty much got thrown out the window.  I can't help but wonder if that was a subconscious reaction against all those romances.

It's an interesting thought.  And now I have a lot of shredding to do.

Title: Fallout
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII (OGC)
Genre: Angst, drama.
Characters/pairings: RenoxTifa. Implied CloudxTifa, RudexTifa.
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 2,700
Summary: vice (n): something you need, even if you know it's bad for you.

( Everyday, Tifa opens her bar at five and closes at two. )

Title: Professional Hazards
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII (OGC)
Genre: Drama/general
Characters: Lucrecia, Vincent
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 450
Summary: The first time she met him, his suit was half-covered in blood. (Because simply reading about DoC makes my brain hurt.)

( ''Does it ever bother you?'' )

Title: Hide and Seek
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII (OGC)
Genre: Drama, general.
Characters: Vincent, OFC (with some Vincent/different!OFC in the prologue).
Rating: PG-ish
Summary: A Turk mission decades before the war with Wutai. A chance meeting because of a bottle of whiskey and a torn shirt. Thirty-three years later, a woman comes looking for Vincent Valentine. (Or, I try to write a "Vincent has a daughter!" story that doesn't quite suck.)

This fic has been discontinued (yes, after just the prologue DX), and is here purely for archival purposes.


Prologue



All other fics can be found here.

Title: Stability
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII (OGC, mild AC influences)
Genre: Drama/angst
Characters: Tifa, Reno
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 700
Summary: It's always a Thursday he comes in. (Post-game.)

( Always a Thursday, the last week of the month. )

Title: Miel
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Angst, drama, experimental.
Characters: Yuffie, Vincent.
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 630
Summary: Thoughts. Names. The reasons behind them.

( She's sure he doesn't like her. )

Title: Final Fantasy's Seven Endless Movements
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII / The Sandman
Genre: Drama, general, experimental.
Characters: Yuffie, Cid, Aeris, Tifa, Cloud, Barret, Vincent, the Endless.
Rating: PG to PG-13
Word count: exactly 300 apiece (2,100 total)
Summary: Experimental drabble collection, pairing (in the non-romantic sense) each of the Endless with a FFVII character. (They start in game and end post-game.)

( one for sorrow )
( two for joy )
( three for a girl )
( four for a boy )
( five for silver )
( six for gold )
( seven for a secret never to be told )

Title: Nine O'Clock On the 62nd Floor
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII (OGC)
Genre: Supernatural/angst
Characters: Hojo, Lucrecia!OC
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 2,650
Summary: It was pure coincidence that he happened to come across her that day. It had to be. Because he wasn’t the one with demons haunting him, was he? ...Wasn’t he? (Pre-game fic.)

( Nine o’clock at night and the lights of one of the 62nd floor labs were on. )

Title: Insurance Won't Cover Apocalypses (But Listerine Kills Germs That Cause Bad Breath)
Fandom: Final Fantasy VII (OGC)
Genre: Parody, humor.
Characters: Tifa, Vincent, a smidge of Cid.
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 2,500
Summary: Vincent finally reveals the reason why the bottom half of his face was always covered, and it isn't nearly as Romantic as some might have thought. Also, Tifa briefly contemplates the unnecessary complexity of everyday domestic items.

( It was a beautiful day for those in Avalanche… )